Part 1: Principle 3: Arouse in the other person an eager want.

"Tomorrow you may want to persuade somebody to do something.  Before you speak, pause and ask yourself: "How can I make this person want to do it?'"

So how would one go about this...hmmm...?  Now, read the quote again.  If you actually do this, it will help you take your time and think about the other person.  Have you ever heard that everyone's favorite subject to talk about is themselves?  So if you start by talking to the other person about them or what they want, you will build a relationship.

The question you might be asking yourself now, is: "What if it is a stranger or somebody I don't know?"  If this is the case, start by asking the other person questions.  Have you ever hear of the "F.O.R.M." technique?  Family, Occupation, Recreation, Money or Message (depending on who you ask).

God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason.  We should listen more than we speak.  So this next week, let's focus on listening and really getting to know people.  You may find a new friend or maybe you will find yourself learning more about your current friends and/or family.  Enjoy listening! :)

Part 1: Principle 2: Give Honest and Sincere Appreciation

"Dr. John Dewey said that the deepest urge in human nature is "the desire to be important.'"



 What a bold, yet true statement.  So in the simplest terms, if you want to get someone to do something for you, make them feel important.  How do you make someone feel important?  Appreciate them!  You can't just do it to blow smoke though.  You have to actually mean it!

"We often take our spouses so much for granted that we never let them know we appreciate them."

This statement really hit home for me.  I really like this statement because you can interchange the word, spouse for brother, sister, mom, dad or even friend. 

One of Jarrod's (my husband) "jobs" in the house is to do the dishes so I can get to work on business or volleyball right after dinner.  He does dishes so often that sometimes I go a whole week without saying "thank you" to him for doing the dishes.  Even though dishes are pretty simple, it is something worth appreciating.  If you really think about it; isn't it the small things that are done all the time, the things that make our lives easier.  It is easy to thank someone for a gesture done out of the ordinary, like a gift, because it is unexpected.  But doesn't everybody do that.  We are trying to be unlike other people.  If you are the only one at work saying thank you on a reagular basis, do you think you might be the first to get a raise or a larger bonus...?  It may not, but this is something so easy to do and also easy not to do.  Therefore most people don't!  What if this did work...?  This may not get you the raise or the bonus, but it is a start; and if you start small and grow from that, the next thing you do might be the tipping point for what you want.

Make a concious effort to make this change.  It will make you feel better :)

"How to Win Friends & Influence People" - Dale Carnegie

I don't know about you, but I can defenitely say I do not like to read or maybe I should say I didn't like to read when I was younger.  When I was in middle school and high school I wasn't a big fan of reading and I think there are 2 main reasons why.

1- Neither of my parents read much.  And I don't ever recall seeing a book in their hands.
2- When I did read, it was because I was "forced" to for school (and for those of you that don't know me, I don't like to be told what to do).

When I started college I always remember saying, "I wish I liked reading, I just don't like it."  And I think I felt that way because I was starting to realize that reading really does make you smarter.  To be honest, I didn't read much more than I had to in college either.

So where am I now?  I still have a hard time reading and not dosing off, but what I have found is that I LOVE reading when it is my choice.  I have always loved learning new skills, facts, information...so really I knew this was going to be one vehicle to help me learn.

I started a side business not too long ago and I found that reading personal improvement/development books are really what I like.  These books are going to be the ones that help me succeed as a business woman, a coach and maybe most importantly as a wife.

I have just started reading "How to Win Friends & Influence People" by Dale Carnegie and what a great book so far!  This book will be my main focus for this blog, but more than that this blog is just going to be a journal for my thoughts.  I welcome your comments, so please do let me know what you are thinking.

It would be really cool too, if you bought this book and read it at the same time as me because then we can compare notes.  And even though I have already started, I am somewhat of a slow reader so it won't take long for you to catch up.  I know you will love this book :)

~ Michelle's Mind